la beauté rebelle: Shit changes, man.

Reblogged from justtrinaaa-deactivated20120213

justtrinaaa:

It’s amazing to me how relationships change - It amazes me, fascinates me, makes me sad, makes me excited, make laugh, makes me cry.
Someone can be the only one you ever thought about, the only person you talked about. You couldn’t ever imagine hating at them, let alone yelling at them. And that can just go away. I remember when Steph & I first met, I had wrote in a journal that being with him “felt like the whole world could be falling apart around me & I wouldn’t be able to stop smiling”. I remember feeling that way. I remember being SO happy whenever he would even recognize my existence. Every phone call, every text message, everytime we hung out, it was constant euphoria. Unreal amounts of love. I loved him SO MUCH, I honestly can’t put it into words to really describe it. And I look at us now & it’s just so different. It’s like watching the world go from tropical rainforests to the Ice Age. The change is so drastic. It’s amazing what 5 years can change, isn’t it?
Jesus, it’s amazing what ONE year can change. I can look back on every year of my life & watch how much everything changes & yet I’m so shocked when everything does. Hmm, funny how that works. Or maybe it just takes awhile before you finally accept that shit just changes & rainbow-butterfly-world doesn’t last forever, no matter who is in that world with you. You can sit there & spend every single day with a best friend, tell them every deep, dark, selfish thought you have. Every secret. And the next year, you’re censoring what you say, you don’t have any desire to see eachother. Shit changes, man.
And maybe that is a part of growing up - realizing that, accepting it. Getting your head out of the clouds & looking at the ground & staying there. Being happy in what & who I have without making it my sole cause of happiness because it might not be my happiness later. And then I’d have none. It’s about learning to fall in love, not jump into love. And about being honest about who you are because who you are might not be who you are in a few years… So why fucking lie about who you are, or moreso - not let people know who you really are? Who knows if you’ll like the same shit in a year, or believe the same things, trust the same people? You don’t. So enjoy what you really enjoy now. Love who you really love now. And be who you really are now. It’s all we have.